At Janet's Raglan bach:
J (referring to the recorder) We don't want – we don't need that.
P (indistinct due to ongoing noise in recording from heavy rain on the iron roof)
J OK. I thought I felt surrounded by a heavy presence and they said – what did they say?
(recounting from memory from the internal conversation with a manifesting entity during the just concluded quiet meditation)
^We are glad that we have you here with us again, we appreciate the efforts you make to clear this land of energies that are not in harmony with this particular place.
J They said that even though they were of us, I guess meaning Maori, they have lost or had lost the connection with the land that is the essential component to maintaining a connection with this place. They said they were sad to see that their youth had lost spirit, lost heart, and were lost to them. I have a feeling that even though it appears to be just doing housework and cleaning it's actually a showing of love for the spirit of the place.
P The god's will desecrated?
J I guess so. And even if it's only a house, a house is not what it's about.
J It's something that's grown from the land anyway and this particular place (bush property) is not detracting from – it's not a mausoleum and it's not something grandiose, it's blending with the heart of the place.
P That's interesting because right at the beginning I felt all this turbulence here (solar plexus) and the impression of emotional distress which might express itself as (indistinct) That didn't last very long. So whether that was related to some of the stuff which has gone on here in recent weeks or since I was here last as background to the feeling of the place.
J What do you mean?
P (referring to tenants just evicted from the property) Just people in degrees of conflict.
J Yes, they clearly were. (over getting chucked out and interpersonal issues) And I got the distinct impression that we should pray for them.
P Let's do that. (5 minute silent prayer follows)
J Been to sleep?
J Anything happening?
P What were we doing – a prayer for the people. Then remembering the things that have happened here (indistinct)
J You've done so much work!
P It's part of the deal of being here. What about you?
J What I think I heard was that although it's easier for me to sell this place it's not necessary because (indistinct)
P Mm. Is that something you have put on yourself?
J Mm, tie up all the loose ends (before I die).
P Which would have put pressure on you
J (indistinct) But I don't need to because I'll keep alive.
P Is it a major pain you've had (driving the urge to die)
J Not a major pain, no, I've just had enough. I've had a great life. Except I'm going to be vaguely incapacitated for the rest of it. I was thinking the other day about ageing, and your (one's) teeth going and things like that and realising my teeth are alright now and thinking bloody hell, I wish I wouldn't think things like that!
P (laughs at the thus revealed internal conflict over aspirations of living vs dying)
Peter Calvert - AgapeSchoolinz